For every professional cyclist, hope springs eternal. Season after season, there is another race to chase, another all-encompassing goal to pursue. But they cannot outride time forever. Sooner or later, the athletic career concludes, and the rest of life begins – and it has no route profile or finish line.
There is no longer the reliable routine of training camps and races, no monthly salary dropping into their bank account, no more nutritionists suggesting what to eat, not even a membership in their team’s WhatsApp group anymore. Welcome to the void of retirement.
“As soon as you’re gone, it’s almost like you were never there,” Grace Brown tells Cyclingnews. “A lot of riders don’t want to talk about it. They don’t want to think about the end of their career or have that conversation until it’s the end, or have that conversation until it’s really time.”
It’s been 14 months since the Australian left the sport, bowing out at the very top of her game, months after winning an Olympic time trial gold medal and the World Championships time trial. Initially, it was liberating: Brown went on holiday to Japan and the USA and was in demand for events and motivational talks. She didn’t have to think about her next direction because her diary was full. But there was no escaping the paradigm shift.
“Even though I felt I had a lot to come back to, no matter how much you plan for it all or mentally prepare, it’s still a really big change,” Brown says. “There’s the identity side of it: I can no longer call myself a pro cyclist.”
“Sometimes I struggle so much with the fact [that] I can’t do what I used to. I almost avoid riding with people that I know are going to be stronger than me now,” she says, laughing. “I’m too competitive! You have to accept that this is the new reality.”
“Your whole network changes,” Brown adds. “What I do on a daily basis has completely changed. It used to be so clear: waking up in the morning like ‘right, I’ve got one hard thing to do today: get on my bike and get the best out of myself.’ When you stop doing elite sport,…
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